Do your emotions often make you do the wrong things, make bad choices or behave in ways you don’t want to behave?
Do you often experience that “struggle inside” that makes things harder for yourself than they have to be? Or avoid doing the right thing because you are scared of conflict?
Developing emotional maturity will make things easier for you in all areas of life and help you get the things you want, achieve your goals and establish fulfilling relationships with other people.
What Is Emotional Maturity?
Instead of using a lot of big words, let’s just put it this way: emotional maturity = mastering your feelings.
Mastering not in the way of “controlling” or “forcing” yourself to feel a certain way – but having a kind of emotional wisdom. Being able to choose how you react upon any given feeling, instead of impulsively acting out your emotions and moods.
When you’re emotionally mature you allow yourself to experience the full spectrum of human emotions, even the “negative” emotions. But instead of being a slave of sentiments, you’re the captain who navigates the ship to your desired destination. You are aware of the waves and tides, and you don’t try to change them, but you use them to achieve your goals.
Some people are lucky to have the right kind of experiences and people around them at a young age, and they reach high emotional maturity levels at a young age. Other’s have to strive and make an effort to emotionally mature later on in their adult lives. But no matter where you are now – you can always get to the next emotional maturity level.
Developing Emotional Maturity
The first step is to find out where you are. What are your weaknesses, what are your strengths?
- Maybe you’re good at being assertive in conflict situations, but you easily get carried away by your own moods.
In that case, a desirable goal would be: I want to learn improve my mood, and not be susceptible to bad moods.
- Or maybe you’re pretty emotionally stable and moods don’t affect you that much, but when you faced with a conflict, you fold and give in.
Goal: I want to be able to stand up for myself and get my point across. I want to be comfortable to engage in conflicts and skilled in resolving them.
- Maybe you want to improve your ability to interact with people you don’t like.
Goal: Learn to communicate with other people without apathy getting in my way.
- Or how do you feel if someone around you gets really emotional? Do you want to escape situations like that, or do you still feel comfortable?
If that is inconvenient for you, a desirable goal could be: Be at ease around emotional people.
- Do you find it hard to talk about your own emotions and express how you feel?
Goal: Share my feelings with others without fear.
- Do you easily get upset about things that are outside of your control? For example, if you’re stuck in traffic, do you get all worked up?
If so, a desirable goal would be to stay relaxed during a traffic jam. Because being upset isn’t going to move your car any faster, and it doesn’t have any other benefit.
There are so many situations and patterns of emotional immaturity – these are just some examples.
It helps you if you can pinpoint specifics and then work on those, instead of trying to become more emotionally mature. Consciously put yourself in situations several times each week where you can practice and train your emotional intelligence.
And having the right mindset, being able to think the way that emotionally mature people think is a powerful accelerator in the process of becoming more mature. Hypnosis can help you to subconsciously shift your thoughts to develop emotional wisdom.