If you want to have a happy and lasting relationship, one absolutely necessary ingredient is trust. Without trust your partnership is bound to fail. A recent study ((Laura B. Luchies, Jennifer Wieselquist, Caryl E. Rusbult, Madoka Kumashiro, Paul W. Eastwick, Michael K. Coolsen, Eli J. Finkel. Trust and Biased Memory of Transgressions in Romantic Relationships.. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 2013; DOI: 10.1037/a0031054)) confirmed that even though trust often makes people a bit delusional when it comes to their partners’ behavior, it does indeed make relationships better and stronger and longer-lasting.
Scientists from the Northwestern University and Redeemer University College (Ontario, Canada) found out that partners who trust their lover, husband or wife do remember things “too positive”: they remember their partner being more considerate than he or she really was, and less hurtful.
People who have trust issues on the other hand (not trusting others) tended to remember their partners’ behavior too negative.
Because of the way how trust “distorts” your memories of your partner, it affects how you feel about him or her in the present – and how much joy and happiness you get out of a relationship, as well as how desirable the relationship is to your partner.
But even if you feel that romantic relationship is worth the effort of building (or re-building) trust – how do you go about it? How can you learn to trust again?
That’s not an easy thing to do. For one, you’ll probably be haunted by doubts repeatedly, questioning whether your partner is honest. You might feel compelled to request some kind of “proof” from your partner that he or she is honest with you and worthy of trust – but requesting these kinds of proofs can hurt a relationship and be extremely emotionally tiring to your partner.
What you need is partly also to have trust in your own judgment, rather than more doubts.
Much of this isn’t so much about rational thinking or logic (even though we make it out to be that way in our minds), but about emotional needs and desires and subconscious habits, which are very difficult to consciously control. That’s why even when you make the conscious decision that you want to be more trusting, it can still be very challenging. That’s why this self-hypnosis download can be so useful: because it contains hypnotic suggestions which address your subconsciousness, making it easier to trust the person you love and have more confidence in your own judgments.
So let’s wrap this up with the following question: In which ways would you have a more happy and fulfilling relationship if you would trust your partner more? Take a few moments to answer this question, and then try to listen to the MP3 hypnosis download.