You’ve already made a first big step to stop jealousy here: you acknowledged the fact that you have a problem with jealousy, and you are looking for a way to stop it. Most jealous people never get this far – they lay all the blame on their partner instead. It takes a lot of courage and honesty to take personal responsibility and decide to change it.
Jealousy can turn into a self-fulfilling prophecy, and in serious cases it often does. Even if you have a partner who is committed to you, loves you and is completely honest with you – if you constantly bombard him with false accusations and get into fights about things that never happened, you’ll drive your partner away from you.
It’s clear that you honestly love your partner. Nobody wants to risk losing someone that is so special and precious. But if your fear of losing your partner is so much out of control that it makes you feeling jealous, then you need to learn how to control that fear so you can save your relationship from your own jealousy.
Reasons For Jealousy
Jealousy shows that you don’t believe in the strength of your relationship – and you might want to ask yourself why.
Most jealous people would say that they’re jealous because of the way their partner is acting, but jealousy is usually more about yourself than about your partner.
- Is it maybe because the relationship is otherwise too good to be true?
- Is it because on some level, you think you’re not worth it to have such a harmonious relationship?
- Is it because you are plagued by feelings of inadequacy?
- Is it because some part of you wants the drama and excitement that comes with jealousy?
How Jealouy Works
What basically happens when you’re jealous is that you constantly imagine your partner doing things with another person – or you imagine your partner wanting to do things with another person – that he or she should be doing with you.
It’s an extremely painful mix of emotions: there is anger, fear, betrayal, humiliation, abandonment, envy.
Again, these kind of thoughts are outside of your conscious control – you can’t simply stop them, and they tend to hijack your brain. In a way, they are obsessive thoughts that happen automatically.
Hypnosis against jealousy can help you to stop these automatic thoughts and regain a healthy confidence. It helps you to recognize jealousy for what it is – basically, an “instigator” that wants to drive a wedge between you and your loved one.
It’s a form of paranoia – you might believe that somebody is trying to take your partner away from you. But that “somebody” might just be your own jealousy, an imaginary rival.
Remember why your partner is with you – because of all the things he likes and loves about you. Because you are attractive to him. But if there is a constant lack of trust and an atmosphere of suspiciousness, then this can really eliminate all the attraction he feels towards you.
Because your jealousy can make him or her feel constantly under pressure – and nobody enjoys that feeling. Nobody likes to have to justify and explain and proof that they’re innocent. Oftentimes jealous people try to control a loved one, and that always has a damaging effect on the relationship.
Jealousy doesn’t protect you against your partner having an affair or leaving you for somebody else. Quiet the contrary is true. The best way to make sure that your partner is honest and faithful to you is to make him or her feel good around you. But you can’t do that if you’re feeling jealous.
Many people think that when they get hypnotized to stop being jealous they will become naive and believe everything their partner says. But that is not the case: jealousy hypnosis helps you to be more rational, to assess the situation more realistic and to better recognize the cues your partner gives you whether he or she is being honest or not.
Let’s not kid ourselves either: sexual infidelity happens in the real world. And we don’t want to close our eyes to it or pretend it doesn’t exist. But excessive jealousy is real too. It’s kind of like a woman who doesn’t go out of her house because there are murderers on the streets. Sure, people sometimes get murdered on the street, but what are the real chances that there is a murderer on the street you walk on who also happens to want to murder you?
It is very difficult to overcome the automatic thoughts of jealousy with conscious effort alone. These thoughts and feelings just appear in your mind effortlessly, and that is a clear indicator that they are part of a subconscious mental process.
Our subconsciousness is one of our greatest assets, and we couldn’t function properly without it. But that doesn’t mean it’s perfect or fault-free. Jealousy hypnosis helps to fine-tune it for optimum functioning in a healthy and satisfying relationship.
Is Someone Else Better Than You?
Maybe you sometimes compare yourself to other people, and you believe that your partner finds someone else more attractive, more charismatic, more desirable than you.
As long as you keep these comparisons going you’ll never be able to take care of your own self-esteem. Because there is always someone who might be in some aspect “better than you”.
Psychologists know that people who feel insecure are the most unrealistic when it comes to perceiving threats and making accusations.
The question is not whether another person is “better than you” – the question is: what can you do to strengthen the emotional bond between you and your partner? (Hint: acting jealous and possessive isn’t helping!)
Whether that rival you feel so threatened by is real or imagined – if you feel jealous, it puts you in an emotional state of possessive neediness, and that is making you more unattractive.
Jealousy – A Source of Personal Insight?
What can jealousy teach you about yourself? This isn’t a comfortable question to ask, but it might help you in your maturing further as a person. Oftentimes you may find out that the relationship between your parents or your own early relationships did somehow foster your jealous thoughts.
There is something positive to jealousy too: it shows that you want to maintain an intimate relationship. But it’s simply “the wrong tool” for the purpose. It’s like trying to fix a screw with a hammer instead of a screwdriver.
And it can be a breeding ground for dangerous passions too. In fact, criminal statistics show that jealousy is the most common cause of homicide.
So can hypnosis cure jealousy?
No – only you can cure your own jealousy. But hypnosis can help you to do so. If you feel like you can’t stop feeling jealous, but you want to overcome jealousy, then hypnosis can make it happen a lot easier and faster than you could do it without hypnotism.